Re: MIDASWAD - Matz is Dumb and so We are Dumb

On Mon, Jun 20, 2011 at 3:22 PM, Chad Perrin <[e-mail]> wrote:
> Frankly, if everyone had left it at Ilias' first post and the necessary
> statement that we shouldn't feed the troll, life would be grand right
> now.
>
> As it is, however, even the expressions of support for the "please don't
> feed the troll" warning have served to undermine it, and we're right back
> where we were with the require_relative thread. =A0I give up.

I learned something today. People will go out of their way to comment
on things that have no bearing on their day to day, and may even have
been of use to someone. You know what, though? They won't go so far as
to offer the help to the individual who needed it, in the manner that
it should have been given.

I have wronged you and provoked the anger of our peers, and I would
like to apologize. I don't know how you feel about my comment. I hope
we can be buddies, you know? Your silence speaks to me, though, and I
feel ashamed.

I am sorry. I don't know much about you, but please allow me to say
that you are clearly a wonderful, intellectual person with much to
offer the world.

Now, If I may, I would like to tell you how to cook an egg, when it
has been encapsulated by a pepper. I would like to preface this by
informing you that, were you to elect to cook it without the pepper,
the cooking of the egg is much the same. Were you to replace the
pepper with, perhaps, an onion ring, it is delicious. However, if you
don't like onions, I understand.

First, heat the pan so that when you place water on it, it sizzles
slightly, but not so much that it evaporates faster than you can count
to seven. Place a small amount of butter in the centre of the pan. You
can use margarine, or even olive oil if you want, but the centre of
the pan is the best place for an even heat. Once greased, place the
ring of vegetable on the pan. Me, I like my peppers to be cooked. I'm
not a fan of raw peppers, so I get it a bit brown on the bottom, then
flip it over. This allows both sides to be just the way I like. This
is of course to taste, so again, I leave that to you. Once it has been
flipped, that's when you want to place the egg in the middle. If you
did not flip, or if you like raw peppers, you can just go straight to
putting the egg in there.

Now, the egg itself only takes maybe two minutes to get to a heat
where it would be safely rid of salmonella. I'm not a chef or a
biologist, this is just what I've been told, and my parents enjoy
runny eggs so I let it go. Do you have parents that like things you
don't? I hear that's common. But I digress. I like to cook it closer
to six, some times five minutes. I just realised that the first link I
provided listed four minutes, which for me is just not doneenough. I
don't like that little bit of wet around the yolk. In fact, I normally
break the yolk just so that doesn't happen. You can do this too, if
you'd like.

Now, while it is cooking and still soft, this is when I like to add
some broken black pepper, garlic powder, onion powder (keep in mind,
that if you've replaced the pepper ring with an onion, the onion
powder is optional.), and salt. I really enjoy garlic, so I put a good
bit in there. I cannot provide you measurements, as I have those
shaker things you can buy pretty well anywhere, and I just keep going
until I think "Yes, that should be enough". The same goes for the
onion powder and black pepper. Perhaps I should also mention that I
use a pepper grinder to to get my black pepper in there. In case you
have not done it, I would suggest against eating a whole black pepper
seed. I think they are seeds, I am not a botanist.

Once it is done cooking, I lather it in vinegar. My family finds this
repulsive, but I have noticed that the pepper ring gives the vinegar a
nice "cup" to sit in, and really soak in. I also add more salt. I'm
not a healthy eater, Bunsin Honey Dew, so I would suggest against
adding as much salt as I do. I won't tell you how much I add, just to
stave off that possibility. Now that I think about it, by not telling
you how much I have added, that may commit you to curiosity. I add
about four shakes from a table salt shaker. This is on top of the
other two shakes I added while cooking.

I am deeply sorry for my presumptuous grasp at buddy-dom previously,
and more so for the possible insult suffered by linking to you
directions for frying an egg. This was wrong of me, and I hope this
finds you before you make your attempt, and thus comes to some use.